Saturday, 2 May 2015

World Naked Writing Day

Today is World Naked Gardening Day. I’ll bet you didn’t know that, did you?
Now, I like a bit of fun, but I have a few observations to make.
First, the temperature outside is lower than a snake’s doings, and it’s threatening rain. Mother always told me never to go out without my vest on, and I have enough problems with bronchitis, etc. as it is. I don’t fancy spending the rest of the summer with my chest wrapped up in brown paper and Vick.
Second, have you seen my garden? It needs a demolition gang to get it up to bombsite standard.
Third, Joe is not allowed to shit in the street, so he does it in the garden and I wouldn’t want to walk through that in my bare feet.
Fourth, the neighbours complain when I go out without a shirt. Apparently all that ageing meat puts them off their dinner.

Finally, as a man, I don’t think I would dare get close to the rose bushes. Those thorns are bad enough to get out of your fingers.
Still, in keeping with the general principles, and because I’m a sociable guy, I will join in with the inaugural World Naked Writing Day.
I am going to sit here all day wearing nothing but a smile while I type out this drivel.
Things could get a bit awkward when Joe needs to go walkies, though.


suzy doodling said...

I've been gardening, but wrapped up warm. This is England.

David Robinson said...

Hope you enjoyed the garden, Suzy.

It's raining here, so I really did spend the day writing, but I had to dress. Orders from the missus, even if it was only a pair of joggers and a T-shirt.